have you tried the toblerone, insolent infant? it’s cheap if you can afford a lot of it i have a theory identic twins in tandem are set at random on their paths different, but the same
and that’s the end of part one! i think i enjoyed it . it’s been a lot of work. i’m tired. i hope it resonates with someone out there in the ether.
i’m going to do something a bit different for second half of the year. tune in from tomorrow for more poetry in ‘the love epochal part two: getting there (a brexit prayer)’.
head on over to edge of humanity magazine to enjoy my latest publication, a short work called “green”. it is an extract from a novella i have been working on called “comin’ up: a neurodivergent memoir”, a tale of sabotage, folly and accidental murder set around the second millennium c. e.
all through the night, we have no past, we won’t reach back dilatory breathing, with the inmates chewing fat i always laugh when i chop onions, ever since my pet cat killed himself
all through the night is a cyndi lauper song. its a banger! what an artist.
dilatory is one of my favourite words. i am curious about the etymology – is it related to delay? if so, why isn’t it spelt delaytory? – but not so curious to look it up. another of my favourite words, i think i mentioned before, is demonstrable. a combination of demons and monster. quite scary.
chewing the fat means blethering or gossiping. shooting the breeze. we have loads of words for banter and patter round our way.
i schedule noxious imbibition and obnoxious noise projection with colleagues, on a rager, dipsomaniacal
i was thinking about stars. what do they symbolise? parts of empires. 50 stars for the 50 states of america. or the stars of the european flag, representing the 12 founding members of the european union. or the 27 states/districts/stars of brazil. i don’t know what the australian stars mean but whatever it is, i mean, we are in empire territory, aren’t we?
and boo a ghost. haha. it’s meant to be boo a goose. but an old friend’s colleague used to say ‘x would be scared to boo a ghost,’ which i found hilarious as its an altogether different prospect. it would be a flimsy character who wouldn’t have the matter about them to boo a goose. an encounter with a spectral being would likely put one so firmly on the backfoot that any booing would be bizarrely foolhardy.
this is the last part of part one! i will be dissecting it in the blog over the month. i’m not going to post every day though. this six months of contect has really taken me more like 18 months of work, so i’m slowing down a little.
the poem continues of course, but from july i will be posting less frequently while i work on new music, and on my first novella ‘comin’ up: a neurodivergent memoir’ which will be published later this year.
chaos vikings marchin’ under summer’s radiation space tunnel violinist, what did we do to you? reflect on convalescence’s end, my reaction improved stars are parts of empires, feart to boo a ghost i schedule noxious imbibition and obnoxious noise projection with colleagues, on a rager, dipsomaniacal the bread, my sour domain, hers an egg on top perfection is a conspicuous imperfection.. pun-ridden dogger-elly sub-nonsense in ifunereal nomenclature and dress but i did have six toasts today, all of them doublers (lentil, tuna rocket; salmon shallot; ched spicy) you meet someone you know from gossip our hour our sense our self in each case you can choose to cooperate or cheat and hybrid work means shivering alone by a lockfast window on a sunny day my favourite track, the album’s last round the oval, and pound the quad on the verge of an irretrievable memory, a texture, a vague sense tangled shoe, cockapoo, over you, road rash tattoo honestly what are the odds? the prophecy came first much too soon, then again a bit too late we all rely on the good souls who forgive us.
have you tried the toblerone, insolent infant? it’s cheap if you can afford a lot of it i have a theory identic twins in tandem are set at random on their paths different, but the same
all through the night, we have no past, we won’t reach back dilatory breathing, with the inmates chewing fat i always laugh when i chop onions, ever since my pet cat killed himself liberty’s light will lead us there, libraries gave us power elongate the environ of the emblem of they who shall be emancipated pishhead magnetism combines us, their yolk won’t define us (con)serve – not conscripted infantry but torpid flabby midgetry superiors drink-sodden day-to-day erudite popinjays oh god this ship is sinking fast, just hope we make the buddha last if everyone had to pay market rent on their home forever the market would reach an equilibrium that would be better for everyone except the rentier class, who belong in jail, and may well end up there were there lots of you? well that’s a posse honestly i’m just trying to live the most wasted, safe life antediluvian nipponese amble celebrants and another two bunnies the next poem will be called the gilet years sugar rush stroll, the last of my 30s, then back to the wall more nippon, this time kitchen, with an ambassadorial element i’m 40 tomorrow and honestly everything hurts, throbs, stings or is otherwise stiff champagne dog run sling factory tour bonnie umbrella honestly right now i feel ok about myself, grateful for what ive been given and have achieved in my four decades so far maybe i’m ready to start reading novels again found the partick co-op for a just poetic society if things are going to change anyway, they may as well change for the better ditched blade draped bed and became bin overladen something about ikea bed linen i watch a boring football match in communion with a centimillion europeans all good souls forgive each other
have you tried the toblerone, insolent infant? it’s cheap if you can afford a lot of it i have a theory identic twins in tandem are set at random on their paths different, but the same
it was a year ago that i wrote this. the inflation rate may be lower now, but the gap between what things cost and what we feel like they should cost seems to have been made permanent. its hard not to feel anxious about the state of the economy. so much uncertainty. war. tariffs. irrational, illogical people in positions of power.
this was an idea that occurred to me a few years ago. i was coming up to the age my father was when i was born, and i noticed that there would be, during that year, a day on which i was exactly half as old as my father. and it isn’t a big leap from there to realise that for any two people who live at the same time, assuming both live long enough, there will come a time when one is twice the age of the other. whether it’s when they are two and four or 40 and 80.
i have sort of mystic beliefs about numbers. i can’t explain them really. i think they sometimes convey messages to me. of course, my lover and i, being a coincidental couple, share a day. it fell on 1111 999. how could it not be love?
i have a new verse out today – the text was previously published in edge of humanity magazine, so please check that out if you haven’t already (see link below). now live on youtube, spotify, etc.
every coincidental couple share or will share a day (assuming all live lives that lap over and aside) when one is either twice or half as old as their partner. we only live in relation to each other: brothers, sisters, mothers, fathers, children we are all in second place again, lo siento, i feel your pain then a vow: to talk much more on the telephone hazy jane mountain range and a mouthful of blood the chip shop salt and vinegar on the edge of the breeze decline is the consequence of a millennium without conquest bring all ye visigoths, only the sack of london can save us now sometimes perspective illuminates sunny convalescence; can i modify my betrayed reaction? is there space for love without condition between event and response? the universe is comprised of information thoughts are but ephemeral forms deleted from the records for eternity, locked within an evanescent system but are some things unforgivable? let’s hope good souls can hold a grudge with compassion.
chorus
have you tried the toblerone, feckless bairn? it’s abysmally pricey, but so is everything else i have a theory that brexit is the effective sack of london, by hitler different, but the same
this bipolar love hurts so much round infatuated hertz bevvy bivouac, coke and jack in the sack i read about his suicide on teletext in the 90s a poet tortured, bill teller of the apple orchard never socrates unsatisfied nor pig in shit: we are socrates in pig shit, always and 4 real. i cut a lana del rey tattoo into my arm, is that self harm? each generation must make the material their own smell tomato paste and cheddar, my da’s cooking, my home a feeling of disconnection between body and homunculus post-prandial down-dumpsy meek remainderman rain run ink on scar tissue, perineum to the sun this isn’t a cover up, the red rose, the guerilla’s fist i am a loaf of bread, origami, a process in purgatory every pain and every pleasure you caused will be inflicted back and you will judge yourself getting there—a tired prayer to monotony four goes on the playstation then i eat the whole bloody toblerone all that’s left is our dismal materiel we all rely on the good souls who forgive us
chorus
have you tried the toblerone, feckless bairn? it’s abysmally pricey, but so is everything else i have a theory that brexit is the sack of london, by hitler different, but the same
i had this big job interview. i really wanted the gig. i worked so hard on it. there was a presentation, a written exercise, and, well you know, like questions and answers. as is implied by ‘interview’. anyway, there was some other stuff going on in my life at the time, but i felt like i managed to hold it together and come across like a competent human employee hybrid.
but in the end i never got the job, and i pretty much had a breakdown in the evening after the interview – in a fever, despairing. it was a low. the month had started with a spring of optimism. it was about here that the year took a downward turn.
it is one of the main tenets of stoicism that you are best to focus your attention on that which you can control. and that means accepting that there isn’t much you can actually control. and your body is one of the things you can’t control. it gets sleepy. it gets ill. it carries you about and it will one day kill you.
all that i can control are my character, my actions, and my reactions. my thoughts and my judgements upon others. to some extent, as much as i may worry about trump, putin and nuclear war, no good will come of it as i have no control over the outcome.
stoics also embrace the temporary nature of living. things may be how they are today. but that doesn’t mean that its justified, or will be the same in the future. i’ve only lived 4ish decades and how many atlases have i seen rendered obsolete?
the love epochal. n.n. benn 