this was shocking at the time, but nothing compared to the time i accidentally shaved my moustache off when i was sick

push my list to time unknown,
stare blankly at my phone
remove my specs
for the looking glass
overcome briefly
by the novelty
of my naked face
declare a moratorium
on anything
more laborious
than the thought
that all must die
and life goes on
in memoriam

i was sick the other week and the first thing to go is my decision making skills. i don’t know why but i was sure my moustache needed balancing. the next thing to go of course is motor skills. a bit off that side. oops too much. try the other. ah. oh dear. too small. the only viable moustache is now the hitler one. and that is a bad moustache for several reasons. before i knew it i’d shaved my whole face and no longer recognised myself in the mirror. fortunately it has grown back now.