obligation iv

there are but two types of job.
it seems to me
you can be “x and poet”;
or “poet and y”.
why is there no option
not to be a poet
it appears to be the case
that poetry
is a sentence
that must be served
we work so hard
we all do
we need to rest from
always serving others
yet i offer an apologia
for my art
i just feel guilty
whenever i’m not working
so work must be created
then feared and resented
is this a life?

i used to go to the sauna every monday night. funny how life’s little routines change. long bike rides and quiet hot nights. i have these needs i don’t really understand. for space and time. for physical sensations. i never traveled for work for a decade but now i do it again. every few months. and i stay overnight at a hotel and have a sauna. then drink a cold beer with dinner. a new reason to spend some time alone.